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Main Bhi Shahrukh Khan Banna Chahta Hoon
Today morning a young boy of twelve got up from his bed of stones and mud and stepped outside his jhopdi on a deserted portion of Bandstand in Mumbai. He stretched his arms and looked across his modest yet beautifully located abode, at the Arabian Sea in front of him. He turned to his left and saw the face of a man smiling at him. This face had graced him every morning for the last four years. The boy looked at the man’s hair and ran his fingers through his own greasy, unkempt hair hoping that they would comb his hair in a similar fashion. After a few seconds of readjusting his hairstyle, he took one last look at the man and walked towards the road to help his dad to pick garbage. Behind him the man’s face continued to smile on a large billboard. The billboard read, “Shahrukh Khan- The new face of Tag Heuer”.
More than 1500 kilometers away, in Bangalore, I was running on the treadmill in the gym in my apartment, watching the same man on TV dance to the latest hit song “One Two Three Four” from his movie, Chennai Express. I smiled as I watched the 48 year old effortlessly dance to the fast beats; his dimpled smile unchanged for the last 22 years, his energy as high as ever and every stand of his perfectly parted silky hair miraculously remaining in place through every move of his. I looked at my own hair in the mirror, which had undergone many a haircut and minutes of styling to resemble the man’s hair but falling short every single time. I had stopped trying. The 12 year old boy in Mumbai is still hopeful.
Yes, in today’s India, the Ranbir Kapoors, the Imran Khans and the Ranveer Singhs have become the new heartthrobs, the new superstars. But they will never signify the dreams of the millions of men seeping into the city of Mumbai in the wee hours of the morning at Victoria Terminus railway station. Men with dreams of making it in Bollywood. Shahrukh Khan came in without a godfather in the industry. His story has become somewhat of a legend which industry hopefuls recite to their friends with a strange sense of pride. The man who slept on a bench at Marine drive and cursed at the city of Mumbai in desperation, “One day I will conquer this city.”, and today looks over the city from his heritage mansion at Bandstand having apparently fulfilled his “promise”.
And that I think is the essence of Shahrukh Khan. When a young boy from a poverty stricken family living in the slums of Dharavi says, “Main bhi Shahrukh Khan banna chahta hoon”, it doesn’t necessarily mean that he wants to become an actor superstar. It means that he wants to attain the fame and power of this man who has become the Baadshah of his city and commands the respect and adoration of millions of people across the globe. Shahrukh Khan has come to signify the epitome of a dream fulfilled, a rise from rags to riches, the story of reaching high and getting there. He makes a child believe that he doesn’t need a “Kapoor” or “Bachchan” attached to his name to make it big.
This is why Shahrukh Khan still towers above his contemporaries in sheer mass support. He was you, he is what you want to become and hence he always will be a recurring example of who’s success subsequent generations would want to emulate.
Why do I feel like I’m going to be one of those “started from the top and made it to the bottom” losers…
#it's no surprise that I am my best friend
I’m 5’10”. I can’t dunk on a standard basket.
I’m fully aware of that and also aware of the fact that my legs wouldn’t jump high enough for me to even get over a crawling baby.
So when I feel the sudden urge to dunk when i’m at home, I jump and slap the ceiling. I slap the ceiling to feel like I have made a monstrous dunk. The ceiling is quite low.
#new york comic con
#so excited doe
Bought my tickets for NY Comic Con. Man I’m gonna feel like such a loser over there. It’s my first time at NYCC and i have no cosplay costumes and I have no idea how to make one either. And I’m gonna go there in my Iron Man tshirt and be like “Hi guys”. And people will shove me off as a wannabe geek.
Scary Movies Scare Me
#freak me out
I’m not even ashamed to admit it. I despise horror movies. They freak me out. I get scared. Like shit freezing in my asshole scared. Even during the lame ones in which you know exactly when the scary shit is gonna go down.
So I went for this movie called “The Conjuring” day before yesterday with my brother and aunt. And unfortunately, I had to take the seat next to these girls who seemed absolutely out of place because the whole time they were talking about how they want to watch Bhaag Milkha Bhaag and I’m like then why the fuck are you here. But the worst part was that the moment the movie started, I realized that it’s one of those good horror movies which doesn’t have cliched scare tactics and you really don’t know when the motherfucking ghost is gonna do her thing. And I couldn’t let these girls know that I’m a wuss! I had my tight tshirt on and I was looking masculine and buff for the first time in a few years so I really needed to keep the image up. And so every time I felt that the bitch was gonna pull some scary shit, I would whip out my phone and act as if i’m texting. So i would look down and hence didn’t have to look at the screen and all was good. And when the movie did catch me off guard, I would turn my shrieks into laughs so that it sounded like this was funny shit to me. Like I’m watching “The Office” or some shit. And I would keep giving my own input from time to time like, “Hey! ‘Tangled’ was scarier than this!”, or “That shit’s so fake! I can see her wig!”, or “Why doesn’t the ghost have big titties?” That really made me sound like a stud. Let’s face it. The girls wanted the D. Like really bad. Like after the movie, I’m pretty sure I saw them with lollipops in their mouths.
But honestly man, I think I want to advocate Ghost rights. Frankly, ghosts are always portrayed as ugly. Their hair isn’t combed. Their teeth are yellow. Their clothes are ill fitting and tattered and dirty. Their mouths are stained with dried up blood. I mean c’mon! Just because their ghosts, doesn’t mean they’ve lost their sense of hygiene! What you don’t think ghosts comb their hair or at least wipe their mouths or brush their teeth?
And i’m pretty sure ghosts want to look attractive. It’s not like hey now i’m dead. So i don’t need to look good! What if they find a hot ghost in the afterlife! I’m sure they would love to float around in pretty dresses or fancy suits and make love in the attic of some unfortunate family’s house.